to resent
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to resent something
To hold an action or statement against someone and therefore feel hurt or angry with that person. It is often used in the negative form to express understanding.
Ich kann es dir nicht verübeln, dass du nach dieser langen Debatte erschöpft bist.
I can't resent you for being exhausted after that long debate.
The verb is made up of the prefix 'ver-' and the adjective 'übel' (bad, evil). It literally means to count an action against someone 'as something bad'. The verb is inseparable.
Er hat mir meinen Fehler lange verübelt.
He resented me for my mistake for a long time.
This verb requires a fixed sentence structure: the person one holds something against is in the dative. The action or thing one resents is in the accusative.
Sie verübelt ihm [Dativ] seine unhöfliche Bemerkung [Akkusativ].
She resents him [dative] for his rude remark [accusative].
'Verübeln' (to resent/hold against) is especially often used in the negative form with 'können' (can). The phrase 'das kann ich dir nicht verübeln' (I can't hold that against you) is a polite way to express understanding for another person's reaction or feeling.
Dass du müde bist, kann ich dir nach der langen Reise nicht verübeln.
I can't hold it against you that you're tired after the long trip.
The accusative object is often not a single noun, but an entire subordinate clause with 'dass' (that). In this case, the pronoun 'es' (it) appears in the main clause as a placeholder.
Ich verüble es ihm, dass er sich nicht gemeldet hat.
I resent him for not getting in touch.
to assign / to forgive / to miss
'vergeben' and 'verübeln' are clear opposites here. When you forgive someone for something, you no longer hold the mistake against them. You are ready to let the matter go. When you resent someone for something, you remain hurt or angry because of an action. So 'vergeben' fits when the anger ends. 'verübeln' fits when the anger remains, or when you show that you find a reaction understandable.
Die Gruppe verübelt Tom nicht, dass er wegen seiner Krankheit zu spät kam.
The group does not resent Tom for arriving late because of his illness.
Nach dem Streit vergibt Lisa ihrem Bruder, weil er sich ehrlich entschuldigt hat.
After the argument, Lisa forgives her brother because he apologized sincerely.