to treat oneself / to not begrudge
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to treat oneself
To do something nice for oneself or allow oneself a special pleasure, a break, or a luxury.
Nach der anstrengenden Woche gönne ich mir ein langes Bad.
After the exhausting week, I'm treating myself to a long bath.
to not begrudge
To not envy someone for a success, advantage, or pleasure, but to sincerely grant it to them.
Ich gönne dir den Sieg, du hast hart dafür gearbeitet.
I don't begrudge you the victory; you worked hard for it.
'Gönnen' is a verb that is almost always used with a person in the dative and a thing in the accusative. The structure is: someone (subject) grants/treats someone (dative) to something (accusative).
Ich gönne meiner Kollegin (Dativ) die Beförderung (Akkusativ).
I don't begrudge my colleague (dative) the promotion (accusative).
When you do something nice for yourself, 'gönnen' is used reflexively. The person then appears as a reflexive pronoun in the dative: 'sich (dative) etwas (accusative) gönnen' (to treat oneself to something).
Heute Abend gönne ich mir ein gutes Buch und eine Tasse Tee.
Tonight I'm treating myself to a good book and a cup of tea.
When you treat yourself to something, it is often a small moment of luxury or enjoyment in everyday life. Typical examples are: 'sich eine Pause gönnen' (to treat oneself to a break), 'sich ein Stück Schokolade gönnen' (to treat oneself to a piece of chocolate), or 'sich einen freien Tag gönnen' (to treat oneself to a day off).
Nach dem Sport gönne ich mir immer eine lange, heiße Dusche.
After exercising, I always treat myself to a long, hot shower.
'Jemandem etwas gönnen' (to not begrudge someone something) is the positive opposite of envy. It expresses that you are sincerely happy about another person's success or happiness and grant it to them wholeheartedly.
Er hat so viel gelernt, ich gönne ihm die gute Note von Herzen.
He studied so much; I truly don't begrudge him the good grade.
to perform / afford
Sich etwas leisten means having enough money for a purchase or luxury. Sich etwas gönnen, by contrast, emphasizes the deliberate enjoyment you give yourself through it. When talking about financial means, use leisten; when you consciously do something good for yourself, use gönnen.
Nach der anstrengenden Woche gönnt sie sich das teure Abendessen.
After a demanding week, she treats herself to the expensive dinner.
Nach der Gehaltserhöhung kann sie sich das teure Abendessen leisten.
After her raise, she can afford the expensive dinner.
